John’s world was collapsing around him. He was diagnosed with prostate cancer and lost his mom to a heart attack in the same month. Dementia was ravaging his dad’s mind. And his adult daughter had stopped talking with him after exploding this bomb at his feet: “You care more about the church than you care about your family.”
This story is real and unfolding right now in middle America in the life of a devoted follower of Christ and a beloved pastor. A pillar in his bucolic community. Heck, John was in the lead car at last year’s Independence Day parade down main street!
That’s the set-up. Here’s the story.
John wants an explanation from God!
After all, he tells himself: “Look at my ministry service and commitment to the church. God not only owes me an explanation; he owes me a way out of this mess.”
NO HE DOESN’T.
God does not owe John or me or you an explanation for anything. WE OWE HIM!
God knows everything. Has everything. Is everything. What in the world could we possibly give him that would create a debt?
The root of this problem is fleshly pride and stealing glory from God for ourselves.
But there is a way out–TELL GOD how you feel as the thoughts form in real time. Even when we feel shame for those feelings. God honors us when we share our unguarded heartbeat with him.
Holding our feelings and emotions inside is like holding our breath. At some point, we must come up for air or we will drown.
Why not come up for air early and tell God about your concerns instead of demanding an explanation?
I ask God to comfort me and provide safety in not needing an explanation from him. To make me feel safe under his protection. To assure me that his truths are all I need.
WHAT ABOUT YOU?
Do you ever feel that God owes you an explanation?
“For all things were created by him, and all things exist through him and for him. To God be the glory forever! Amen.” Romans 11:36